Wherefore Art Thou, Trollhunter?/Transcript

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This is the transcript for Wherefore Art Thou, Trollhunter?

Transcript

	The episode starts offt with Jim, Toby, Blinky and AAARRGGHH!! Arriving in Heartstone Trollmarket. Jim and Toby look at it in awe.
Toby	This is..
Jim	Yeah..
Toby	Woah!
Jim	Pretty much. This is your home?
Blinky	Trollmarket is home, and heart, and sanctuary for all good Trolls. This way my friends, there's much to see.
Toby	Dang! And here I thought the only thing underneath our town was dirty plumbing.
Blinky	Stay close. Human feet have never graced the ground of Trollmarket before.
BG Troll 1	Human?
AAARRGGHH!!	Friends.
Jim	This is crazy! Are you getting this Tobes?
Toby	Oh yeah, on it! [Starts taking photos of Trollmarket]
Toby	Check it out! [Starts ointing at crystals] Peridot, Topaz, Cassiterite! Corneroupi...
	Before he could finish his sentence, he realised the rock he was admiring was actually a Troll.
Toby	Uh, hi.
Blinky	Your knowledge of minerals is almost Troll-like Tobias!
Jim	So, your kind? You all live here?
Blinky	Trolls travel from afar to our market, to find comfort and residence. You'll find almost anything you need, and some!
	A big blue Troll covered in crystals (Draal) watch them from the shadows. While walking, gnomes scuttle around their feet.
Jim	Oh, hey little guy! That's a cute pointy hat-
Gnome 1	[Hisses]
Jim	And pointy teeth!
Blinky	[Trying to stomp on them] Go away! Get out of here! Vile vermin! Begone!
Gnome 1	[Blows raspberries and runs off]
Jim	What is that?
Blinky	Gnomes are vermin. Pick-pocket, scum of the Earth! We only tolerate them for their grooming services.
Jim	Grooming?
Blinky	They eat the parasites on the larger Trolls. [Points to AAARRGGHH!!]
Toby	Jim! Jim! Check it out! [Points to the Heartstone] Maximum velocity there!
Jim	Look at that, It's amazing!
AAARRGGHH!!	Heartstone.
Blinky	The lifeforce of Trollkind! The means that keeps us from crumbling to stone, and the source of light and sustenance!
Toby	Okay, that's totally the bomb!
BG Troll 2	What are humans doing here?
BG Troll 3	Fleshbags!
BG Troll 4	Puny!
Toby	I think we've attracted the paparazzi.
Blinky	Friends, there is no need to be afraid, he is the Trollhunte-
Draal	What is this!?
Blinky	I was just getting to that, Draal.
Draal	Human feet have never sullied the ground of Trollmarket before. Who are these fleshbags?
Blinky	Believe it or not, he is... um. How do I put this? Our new Trollhunter!
Trolls	[All gasp in horror]
Draal	He can't be the Trollhunter! He's not a Troll!
	Draal pounds the ground with his fists, knocking Jim backwards into AAARRGGHH!!
AAARRGGHH!!	Amulet chose.
Blinky	Try to remain calm! Destiny is just-
Toby	Show him Jimbo!
Jim	For the power of Merli-
Blinky	Glory!
Jim	Right, sorry. For the glory of Merlin, daylight is mine to command!
	The amulet glows, and magically equips his armour.
Jim	Pretty cool, right?
BG Troll 5	A human protecting us?
	One of the Trolls in the background faints.
Draal	Bushagal! I am Draal, son of Kanjigar, and the amulets rightful heir!
Jim	Uh- You're his son? He's his SON!?
Toby	Yeah, I can see how this could be a problem.
Draal	When my Father felled, the honour should've passed to me!
	Draal attempts to remove the Amulet from Jim, only for it to blast him backwards.
AAARRGGHH!!	Amulet chose!
Draal	We'll see what Vendel has to say about this.
Blinky	Feel free to vigil. In the meanwhile, lots of Trollhunter buisness to be done! Draal, wonderful to see you as always.
Draal	[Growls]
	The group walk off to the Heroes Forge. Toby is examining a very polished stone wall, when Jim's armour deactivates.
Jim	Um, what just happened?
Blinky	The amulet responded to your unconscious command, Master Jim. You are at ease, are you not?
Jim	I am, actually.
Blinky	It senses that! You are beginning to master it!
Jim	Holy trolls! Is this a palace?
Blinky	This is the Heroes Forge!
	As they walk along the bridge-like footpath, Toby peers over the edge to see how deep it is.
Toby	Ooh [Takes a picure]
Jim	Hehehe [Pretends to push Toby off]
Toby	AHH! Don't do that again!
Jim	C'mon.
Jim	Magnifico.
	Jim looks around to see statues of Trolls placed upon giant pillars around them.
Jim	Wait, are these?-
AAARRGGHH!!	Trollhunters
Blinky	Your predecessors, Master Jim. A line of heroism that reaches back to the ages of Merlin! This is the place of the final reposed, Kanjigar the Courageous. One day there will be a statue of you here, Master Jim. One day very far off into the future of course!
Toby	Yeah about that, there's just one thing I'm not getting?
Jim	Just one?
Toby	You guys are Trolls, so"Trollhunter" sounds a little like you hunt yourselves, y'know?
AAARRGGHH!!	Hunt bad Trolls. Gumm-Gumms
Jim	Not exactly the most terrifying name.
Blinky	In Troll-speak, Gumm-Gumm means "Bringer of horrible, slow, painful, and thoroughly calculated death".
Jim	Oh
Blinky	But do not be too concerned Master Jim. The Gumm-Gumms were exiled to the Darklands centuries ago. Only one rose free!
AAARRGGHH!!	And wants to kill you.
Toby	Wait, Bular is one of the unspeakably evil Trolls!?
Blnky	Indeed. His Father and the rest of them now remain exiled to the Darklands but they have been trying to escape for centuries! I sense ill times are upon us, hence the need for us to begin Master Jims training now! Step back please!
	They all step back a few steps.
Blinky	A little further Tobias.
Toby	[Steps back again]
Blinky	Oh, very well.
	Blinky places his two Right hands onto a sphere in the wall and presses it inwards. This activates a large amount of traps.
Toby	That's a big blade!
Jim	Oh no.
	Jim doges all of the swinging blades that come his way.
Blinky	Excellent reflexes Master Jim!
Jim	Great! But maybe we could start off easy? Like you know, with less... grindy things?
Vendel	Blinkous Galadrigal!
	Blinky quickly deactivates the room as a tall, pale, elderly Troll walks in.
Vendel	Blinkous Galadrigal.
Jim	That's your name?
Blinky	Horrible, I know.
Vendel	I wish to meet the fleshbag supposedly chosen by the amulet. [Looks over to Toby] I am Vendel, son of Rundel, son of Kilfred.
Toby	Uh, Toby. Son of Ralph. I live with my Nana.
	Vendel starts examining Toby's body
Vendel	Produce the Amulet Trollhunter.
	He finds Toby's phone, and accidentally break it.
Toby	My phone!
Jim	I think I'm the fleshbag that you're looking for. [takes out amulet]
AAARRGGHH!!	Amulet chose!
Vendel	Hmmm, so Draal tells me, rediculous! However the amulet has been known to make ill-fated choices. [he looks over to Blinky] as YOU know better than most.
Jim	What's that mean?
AAARRGGHH!!	Blinky trained Trollhunter before: Unkar the Unfortunate.
Jim	Why's he "Unfortunate"?
AAARRGGHH!!	First night out. Torn.
Jim	Like conflicted?
AAARRGGHH!!	No. Limb from limb.
	The arm of Unkar's statue fell off, almost crushing Toby.
Vendel	If the amulet chose true, the Soothscryer will reveal it.
Blinky	Please, Master Jim hasn't had even an hours training!
	Vendel makes a gesture for Jim to come over. Jim walks over, and puts his feet into two feet-shaped indents in the ground. A large platform in front of his rises, revealing the Soothscryer.
Vendel	Behold the Soothscryer! It will judge your true spirit! Insert your right hand Trollhunter.
Jim	Um, I'm gonna get it back right?
Vendel	That is part of the test.
Jim	Oh great. [Whispering] Tobes, Tobes! Come here and help me!
Toby	Okay Jimbo. But I am not sticking my hand in there!
	Jim climbs onto Toby in order to reach the Soothscryer. The inside of the machine starts tuning and Jim places his hand in. It gets stuck.
Jim	AHH!
	The Soothscryer spits it back out. Jim lands on Toby
Jim	I'm okay!
Toby	Oh, everything hurts! [looks up to Vendel] Well? What it is it?
Vendel	Inconclusive.
Toby	Inconclusive? Pfft, not doing that again.
Jim	Wait, wait, wait. What does inconclusive mean?
Vendel	It means Trollhunter, that there's never been a human to bear the mantle before. The Soothscryer needs more time to render it's judgement! Let us all hope you live long enough to see.
	Jim and Toby leave, and walk their bikes home.
Jim	Ugh, what have I gotten myself into?
Toby	Um, Trolls? A cool underground city? Indigenous gem forms? Heartstone? What you've gotten yourself into is total awesome mania, man!
Jim	-If I survive!
Toby	Come on! You're gonna get trained by the best! Blinky is-
Jim	His last guy got torn limb from limb! ON HIS FIRST NIGHT!!
Toby	...
Jim	...
Toby	So ther's nowhere to go but up! Oh no, looks like your mom's home. Okay quick! I was bikejacked by three- no, make it seven, members of the Bratva, that's the Russian mob, and then you broke into their hide-out to try to save me and-
Jim	OR, I could tell her your bike got hit by a car, but you're totally fine.
Toby	Eh, that works too I guess.
Jim	Night Tobes.
	Jim enters his house and tries(fails) to sneak upstairs.
Barbara	Jim! I'm in the kitchen!
Jim	Hey Mom! Oh man, you would so not believe, what happened to me on the way home from-
	As he walks into the Kitchen, he sees Mr. Strickler sitting in there.
Barbara	Look who stopped by!
Mr. Strickler	Hello Jim.
Jim	...Mr. Strickler
Barbara	Mr. Strickler came by to congratulate you.
Jim	Oh. That's really... nice!
Mr. Strickler	It' a great honour that you have been chosen to wield this mantle. I have no doubt you'll prove equal to the task.
Jim	Uh-
Barbara	Why didn't you tell me you were trying out for Romeo and Juliet?
Jim	Maybe we could back up a few steps?
Mr. Strickler	Jim, surely you knew you'd run the part of Romeo? After your breathtaking audition yesterday?
Jim	Yeah, after the audition I had to run, but- waitaminute, I get the part?
Mr. Strickler	I was just remarking to your mother that I'm a touch concerned about your being spread so thin. In particularly, in light of your new commitment to the chess club.
Barbara	And I didn't even think you knew how to play chess! Chess, acting, it's like you have this entire secret life that I know nothing about!
Jim	You have no idea.
Mr. Strickler	Atlas too carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. And i am concerned, like him, that you're over-extending yourself.
Jim	I can handle it!
Mr. Strickler	A few days ago, you were falling asleep in class.
Barbara	Wait what?
Jim	Yeah but-but now I am recharged and ready to go! To be or not to be, right? Right?
Barbara	Jim, that's Hamlet.
Mr. Strickler	Thanks, I don't want to overstay my welcome. My phone Mrs. Lake [Hands Barbara a piece of paper]
Barbara	Please, call me Barbara.
Mr. Strickler	Barbara, delighted to meet you!
	Mr. Strickler gets up and leaves.
Barbara	[To Jim] He really likes you!
Jim	Yeah...
Barbara	I've never seen a teacher take such an interest before. And he has a point. There are only so many hours in the day Jim! If your grades slip, even a little, I'm going to insist you cut back, starting with the things you do for me!
Jim	I like taking care of you.
Barbara	Except that it's my job to take care of you!
Jim	Do you know when I was old enough to ask about dad? Remember what you told me? You said "We just have to take care of each other". That's all I'm doing mom!
Barbara	[Hugs Jim] You must be starving. How about, breakfast for dinner? Even I can't screw up an omelette!
Jim	[Mumbling] Wouldn't be so sure.
Barbar	What?
Jim	-I said, sure!
	To be added...