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This is the transcript for Wherefore Art Thou, Trollhunter?.

Transcript

The episode starts off with Jim, Toby, Blinky and AAARRRGGHH!!! Arriving in Heartstone Trollmarket. Jim and Toby look at it in awe.
Toby This is...
Jim Yeah...
Toby Woah!
Jim Pretty much. This is your home?
Blinky Trollmarket is home, and heart, and sanctuary for all good Trolls. This way my friends, there's much to see.
Toby Dang! And here I thought the only thing underneath our town was dirty plumbing.
Blinky Stay close. Human feet have never graced the ground of Trollmarket before.
BG Troll 1 Human?
AAARRRGGHH!!! Friends.
Jim This is crazy! Are you getting this Tobes?
Toby Oh yeah, on it! [Starts taking photos of Trollmarket]
Toby Check it out! [Starts ointing at crystals] Peridot, Topaz, Cassiterite! Corneroupi...
Before he could finish his sentence, he realised the rock he was admiring was actually a Troll.
Toby Uh, hi.
Blinky Your knowledge of minerals is almost Troll-like Tobias!
Jim So, your kind? You all live here?
Blinky Trolls travel from afar to our market, to find comfort and residence. You'll find almost anything you need, and some!
A big blue Troll covered in crystals (Draal) watch them from the shadows. While walking, gnomes scuttle around their feet.
Jim Oh, hey little guy! That's a cute pointy hat-
Gnome 1 [Hisses]
Jim And pointy teeth!
Blinky [Trying to stomp on them] Go away! Get out of here! Vile vermin! Begone!
Gnome 1 [Blows raspberries and runs off]
Jim What is that?
Blinky Gnomes are vermin. Pick-pocket, scum of the Earth! We only tolerate them for their grooming services.
Jim Grooming?
Blinky They eat the parasites on the larger Trolls. [Points to AAARRRGGHH!!!]
Toby Jim! Jim! Check it out! [Points to the Heartstone] Maximum velocity there!
Jim Look at that, It's amazing!
AAARRRGGHH!!! Heartstone.
Blinky The lifeforce of Trollkind! The means that keeps us from crumbling to stone, and the source of light and sustenance!
Toby Okay, that's totally the bomb!
BG Troll 2 What are humans doing here?
BG Troll 3 Fleshbags!
BG Troll 4 Puny!
Toby I think we've attracted the paparazzi.
Blinky Friends, there is no need to be afraid, he is the Trollhunte-
Draal What is this!?
Blinky I was just getting to that, Draal.
Draal Human feet have never sullied the ground of Trollmarket before. Who are these fleshbags?
Blinky Believe it or not, he is... um. How do I put this? Our new Trollhunter!
Trolls [All gasp in horror]
Draal He can't be the Trollhunter! He's not a Troll!
Draal pounds the ground with his fists, knocking Jim backwards into AAARRRGGHH!!!
AAARRRGGHH!! Amulet chose.
Blinky Try to remain calm! Destiny is just-
Toby Show him Jimbo!
Jim For the power of Merli-
Blinky Glory!
Jim Right, sorry. For the glory of Merlin, daylight is mine to command!
The amulet glows, and magically equips his armour.
Jim Pretty cool, right?
BG Troll 5 A human protecting us?
One of the Trolls in the background faints.
Draal Bushagal! I am Draal, son of Kanjigar, and the amulets rightful heir!
Jim Uh- You're his son? He's his SON!?
Toby Yeah, I can see how this could be a problem.
Draal When my Father felled, the honour should've passed to me!
Draal attempts to remove the Amulet from Jim, only for it to blast him backwards.
AAARRRGGHH!!! Amulet chose!
Draal We'll see what Vendel has to say about this.
Blinky Feel free to vigil. In the meanwhile, lots of Trollhunter buisness to be done! Draal, wonderful to see you as always.
Draal [Growls]
The group walk off to the Heroes Forge. Toby is examining a very polished stone wall, when Jim's armour deactivates.
Jim Um, what just happened?
Blinky The amulet responded to your unconscious command, Master Jim. You are at ease, are you not?
Jim I am, actually.
Blinky It senses that! You are beginning to master it!
Jim Holy trolls! Is this a palace?
Blinky This is the Heroes Forge!
As they walk along the bridge-like footpath, Toby peers over the edge to see how deep it is.
Toby Ooh [Takes a picure]
Jim Hehehe [Pretends to push Toby off]
Toby AHH! Don't do that again!
Jim C'mon.
Jim Magnifico.
Jim looks around to see statues of Trolls placed upon giant pillars around them.
Jim

Wait, are these?-

AAARRRGGHH!!! Trollhunters
Blinky Your predecessors, Master Jim. A line of heroism that reaches back to the ages of Merlin! This is the place of the final reposed, Kanjigar the Courageous. One day there will be a statue of you here, Master Jim. One day very far off into the future of course!
Toby Yeah about that, there's just one thing I'm not getting?
Jim Just one?
Toby You guys are Trolls, so"Trollhunter" sounds a little like you hunt yourselves, y'know?
AAARRRGGHH!!! Hunt bad Trolls. Gumm-Gumms.
Jim Not exactly the most terrifying name.
Blinky In Troll-speak, Gumm-Gumm means "Bringer of horrible, slow, painful, and thoroughly calculated death".
Jim Oh.
Blinky But do not be too concerned Master Jim. The Gumm-Gumms were exiled to the Darklands centuries ago. Only one rose free!
AAARRGGHH!! And wants to kill you.
Toby Wait, Bular is one of the unspeakably evil Trolls!?
Blnky Indeed. His Father and the rest of them now remain exiled to the Darklands but they have been trying to escape for centuries! I sense ill times are upon us, hence the need for us to begin Master Jims training now! Step back please!
They all step back a few steps.
Blinky A little further Tobias.
Toby [Steps back again]
Blinky Oh, very well.
Blinky places his two right hands onto a sphere in the wall and presses it inwards. This activates a large amount of traps.
Toby That's a big blade!
Jim Oh no.
Jim doges all of the swinging blades that come his way.
Blinky Excellent reflexes Master Jim!
Jim Great! But maybe we could start off easy? Like you know, with less... grindy things?
Vendel Blinkous Galadrigal!
Blinky quickly deactivates the room as a tall, pale, elderly Troll walks in.
Vendel Blinkous Galadrigal.
Jim That's your name?
Blinky Horrible, I know.
Vendel I wish to meet the fleshbag supposedly chosen by the amulet. [Looks over to Toby] I am Vendel, son of Rundel, son of Kilfred.
Toby Uh, Toby. Son of Ralph. I live with my Nana.
Vendel starts examining Toby's body
Vendel Produce the Amulet Trollhunter.
He finds Toby's phone, and accidentally break it.
Toby My phone!
Jim I think I'm the fleshbag that you're looking for. [takes out amulet]
AAARRRGGHH!!! Amulet chose!
Vendel Hmmm, so Draal tells me, ridiculous! However the amulet has been known to make ill-fated choices. [He looks over to Blinky] as YOU know better than most.
Jim What's that mean?
AAARRRGGHH!!! Blinky trained Trollhunter before: Unkar the Unfortunate.
Jim Why's he "Unfortunate"?
AAARRRGGHH!!! First night out. Torn.
Jim Like conflicted?
AAARRRGGHH!!! No. Limb from limb.
The arm of Unkar's statue fell off, almost crushing Toby.
Vendel If the amulet chose true, the Soothscryer will reveal it.
Blinky Please, Master Jim hasn't had even an hours training!
Vendel makes a gesture for Jim to come over. Jim walks over, and puts his feet into two feet-shaped indents in the ground. A large platform in front of his rises, revealing the Soothscryer.
Vendel Behold the Soothscryer! It will judge your true spirit! Insert your right hand Trollhunter.
Jim Um, I'm gonna get it back right?
Vendel That is part of the test.
Jim Oh great. [Whispering] Tobes, Tobes! Come here and help me!
Toby Okay Jimbo. But I am not sticking my hand in there!
Jim climbs onto Toby in order to reach the Soothscryer. The inside of the machine starts tuning and Jim places his hand in. It gets stuck.
Jim AHH!
The Soothscryer spits it back out. Jim lands on Toby
Jim I'm okay!
Toby Oh, everything hurts! [Looks up to Vendel] Well? What it is it?
Vendel Inconclusive.
Toby Inconclusive? Pfft, not doing that again.
Jim Wait, wait, wait. What does inconclusive mean?
Vendel It means Trollhunter, that there's never been a human to bear the mantle before. The Soothscryer needs more time to render it's judgement! Let us all hope you live long enough to see.
Jim and Toby leave, and walk their bikes home.
Jim Ugh, what have I gotten myself into?
Toby Um, Trolls? A cool underground city? Indigenous gem forms? Heartstone? What you've gotten yourself into is total awesome mania, man!
Jim -If I survive!
Toby Come on! You're gonna get trained by the best! Blinky is-
Jim His last guy got torn limb from limb! ON HIS FIRST NIGHT!!
Toby ...
Jim ...
Toby So ther's nowhere to go but up! Oh no, looks like your mom's home. Okay quick! I was bikejacked by three- no, make it seven, members of the Bratva, that's the Russian mob, and then you broke into their hide-out to try to save me and-
Jim OR, I could tell her your bike got hit by a car, but you're totally fine.
Toby Eh, that works too I guess.
Jim Night Tobes.
Jim enters his house and tries(fails) to sneak upstairs.
Barbara Jim! I'm in the kitchen!
Jim Hey Mom! Oh man, you would so not believe, what happened to me on the way home from-
As he walks into the Kitchen, he sees Mr. Strickler sitting in there.
Barbara Look who stopped by!

Mr. Strickler

Hello Jim.
Jim ... Mr. Strickler
Barbara Mr. Strickler came by to congratulate you.
Jim Oh. That's really... nice!

Mr. Strickler

It' a great honour that you have been chosen to wield this mantle. I have no doubt you'll prove equal to the task.
Jim Uh-
Barbara Why didn't you tell me you were trying out for Romeo and Juliet?
Jim Maybe we could back up a few steps?

Mr. Strickler

Jim, surely you knew you'd run the part of Romeo? After your breathtaking audition yesterday?
Jim Yeah, after the audition I had to run, but- waitaminute, I get the part?

Mr. Strickler

I was just remarking to your mother that I'm a touch concerned about your being spread so thin. In particularly, in light of your new commitment to the chess club.
Barbara And I didn't even think you knew how to play chess! Chess, acting, it's like you have this entire secret life that I know nothing about!
Jim You have no idea.

Mr. Strickler

Atlas too carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. And i am concerned, like him, that you're over-extending yourself.
Jim I can handle it!

Mr. Strickler

A few days ago, you were falling asleep in class.
Barbara Wait what?
Jim Yeah but-but now I am recharged and ready to go! To be or not to be, right? Right?
Barbara Jim, that's Hamlet.

Mr. Strickler

Thanks, I don't want to overstay my welcome. My phone Mrs. Lake [Hands Barbara a piece of paper]
Barbara Please, call me Barbara.

Mr. Strickler

Barbara, delighted to meet you!

Mr. Strickler gets up and leaves.

Barbara [To Jim] He really likes you!
Jim Yeah...
Barbara I've never seen a teacher take such an interest before. And he has a point. There are only so many hours in the day Jim! If your grades slip, even a little, I'm going to insist you cut back, starting with the things you do for me!
Jim I like taking care of you.
Barbara Except that it's my job to take care of you!
Jim Do you know when I was old enough to ask about dad? Remember what you told me? You said "We just have to take care of each other". That's all I'm doing mom!
Barbara [Hugs Jim] You must be starving. How about, breakfast for dinner? Even I can't screw up an omelette!
Jim [Mumbling] Wouldn't be so sure.
Barbar What?
Jim -I said, sure!
To be added...
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